I know I’m leaving in 11 days, and if you’ve been following me here or through a combo of my social media sites (and if you’re not, check out that little bar to the left…!), well then you also know that I’m leaving. So I understand the eyebrow raise when I talk about things that I have missed about the USA (as in, past tense; not “will miss”).

As I’m preparing to leave, I can’t help but compare the wealth of modern conveniences and (generally high) levels of customer service and satisfaction in the USA versus Mexico, where I was living for the bulk of the last 3 years and change. In, fact I’ve been so busy over the past few days seeing, doing, running, purchasing, booking, researching, and lots of other “ing”‘s, including reflecting (and obviously excluding writing), of my good fortune in this country. Also, disclaimer here, the things that I missed are specific to leaving Mexico for the US, as I know that each country in the world has its own unique pros & cons that stack up against your own homeland, wherever that may be.

Two other reinforcing incidents inspired me to write this article, written from my perspective as an expat and not a traveler heading overseas on quick and casual jaunts (wiki link included since this phrase is not all that common in the US). Reinforcing incident number ONE: Someone in a community Facebook page near me posed the question, and I’m paraphrasing here, which Caribbean island to retire to? The second incident was this morning when, after having taken the first dose of a live oral typhoid vaccine less than 24 hours ago, I was moaning in the fetal position with stomach pains.

The first incident–that question to the world–swiftly showed me that I am, in fact, a real DEBBIE DOWNER (wa, wa, waaaaa)). Thinking that it was a serious question to the world, and trying to kick aside all the “Aruba has the best beaches”/”Yeah but St. Maarten is so much fun”/”I really like the fruit juices in the Bahamas”/”Cozumel has great snorkeling” comments, I did my duties as a good citizen and good neighbor and informed my curious

comrade that, in fact, there’s an awful lot to consider with such a move, issues with banking, health care, insurance, distance from friends and family, safety, not to mention an isolation factor that far too many people tend to shrug off.

Say hello to your new BFF! xoxo

And the second incident? The one where I looked like this…?

Sick and/or hungover. PS Do yourself a favor and don’t do a “The Ring” google image search. Just. Don’t.

I had been questioning myself for a minute as to whether or not I was dashing all the children’s dreams of tropical paradise to pieces. But after getting sick, even though it was something mild, and even though I haven’t experienced particularly inferior medical care in foreign countries, I at least like knowing that I have access to educated doctors (I hope) and that I am protected by high healthcare standards in the US and in other Western nations, so I suppose. Note: Florida does not count, people seem to get away with everything there. I knew that my soapbox speech to the group about retiring overseas, at least when it comes chasing the “tropical dream”, was realistic and an honest cautionary tale, to go into such a decision with eyes wide open, whereas “Sand. Beach. Pretty. Snorkeling.” is not looking at the whole picture.

Please don’t despair if you, too, are/were a US expat who spent any length of time in Mexico and you think my list is incomplete–well, I agree with you, and decided to restrict myself to 5 to avoid an endless rant ;). And as soon as she goes public to the world I’ll be introducing a blogging buddy who is living the struggle still, out there in the Yucatan. Without further ado, 5 things that I’ve missed about the USA (from when I lived in Mexico):

1. Easy Banking. In the US, you can do drive-through banking, banking online (in English and Spanish, thank you very much), you can check your statement history in detail usually for somewhere between months ago, you can have checks issued to you in your name (so, you can pay rent or other goodies with these!), banking hours often include “late” hours, with some banks or branches open until 6 pm and with weekend hours, and lots of other goodies. Most of these transactions take place within a matter of MINUTES. I’ve seen steam come out of my mother’s ears when there’s more than a 10 minute delay. In Mexico, on the other hand, when you come in, you better bring your thickest piece of reading, because you ain’t gettin’ outta there in less than 30 minutes. Bonus points if your transaction requires two or more days returning to the bank, or an hour and a half (whichever comes last).
2. Ready to eat fruits & veggies; drinkable water. For some relatively straight forward reasons (basically the drinking water table mixing with the poo water table, + E. Coli somewhere in there), you can’t, or reeeeally shouldn’t drink water unless it has been filtered, as it usually is in most of the large and international hotels throughout the country of Mexico, and fruit & vegetables needs to be cooked/boiled/sanitized in an iodine bath, especially if it’s something that can’t be peeled (e.g., strawberries, lettuce, grapes, etc.). I like being able to pick fruit in the Northeast Summer and eat it right there in the field, and to not worry as to whether or not I soaked a piece first. While I think that Mexico has a delicious variety of tropical fruits, it wasn’t always convenient to eat it. So you win some, you lose some.
3. MAIL. This is something so basic, so ubiquitous in the world we live in, that surely you must think I am kidding. Surely I am not. Whereas perhaps you can receive postcards in Papua New Guinea, and boxes in Burkina Faso, good luck Sr. Chuck when it comes to mail in Mexico. I don’t really have pen pals (does anyone, nowadays?), but it would be really nice to be able to receive a care package… or even an online purchase. Your shipments are not safe whether they are entering, exiting, or even traveling within Mexico, and how do I know this? By trusting all of my Mexican friends who’ve shared with me their own horror stories about parcels and pieces disappearing forever. Furthermore, the concept of an address is a little foreign, too, and I never got the gist of identifying where I lived in at least four or more address lines – a lote (lot), manzana (block), supermanzana (???), and so on and so forth. Google Maps people, if you’re listening, please make an adjustment to your product in Mexico because even the locals don’t know how to identify or write their own address…!
4. Marshalls, Target, and return policies. It’s hard to leave your favorites behind. Between these two stores, I could (probably) do without all others. I’m so NOT a mall shopper, but in Mexico the shopping options include malls (and the stores that populate them), or free-standing boutiques. For the average wages in Mexico, the price/quality value was shocking to me, and me being a pretty well-paid girl. Not only that, but I would wind up never buying anything because “return” is a foreign word (as it is in most countries that are not the US, I’ve learned). It’s not so good for MY pocket, because return policies make me feel like it’s ok to actually spend more, but I feel like I’m empowered to do so, whereas with no return policy I have to rely on my first impression alone, without being able to see a garment/electronic/piece of furniture/whatever outside of the showroom. I tried to return a shirt once to a Mexican department store, picking it out amongst other bias-cut slop designs in the department, only to later reconsider its $55 USD equivalent price tag. Three days later, I was told that I had to file a return request, that the store was not capable of dispensing cash back as a return without a 24 hour notice period, but that this was the first step in the process. I could go on about that one time, but you get the idea.
5. Drivable roads and plausible parking lots. Compared to some places within the city of Cancun (and that goes double, triple for Puerto Vallarta), driving in the US has been a luxurious experience. Here highways are marked with directional information and the government takes care of things like potholes and weather conditions that effect driving (e.g., snow), whereas in Cancun and Puerto Vallarta, the roads would flood sometimes by more than a foot of water during any average storm and road signs few and far between. Parts of major highways in Cancun were free from any type of lighting for 10 mile stretches at a time. The conditions of the cars were just as bad as the highways, and it would not be uncommon to see cars with broken windows, no brakes, and no directional lighting (and if it were a taxi it’s likely that all of these features were conspicuously missing in the same car). Considering Mexico is right behind the US for obesity, the parking spots might be a little wider, too, compared to the generous 6 inches of space on each side of my car, for myself and my passenger to open our doors and exit from. God bless the spacious parking of the USA!

Yes, the water’s beautiful, but whatcha gonna do when you’ve finished swimming?

More to come soon! If you have ever lived in another country or would like to know about what it was like to live in one or if you have any particular travel Q’s, please let me know in the comments and I’d be happy to answer your question through stories! Thanks for reading.